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wellington sex and love addicts anonymous

signs of recovery

about slaa

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©1985 S.L.A.A.

Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, or S.L.A.A., is a program for anyone who suffers from an addictive compulsion to engage in or avoid sex, love, or emotional attachment. Below are the blessings, promises and the signs of recovery.

We seek to develop a daily relationship with a Higher Power, knowing that we are not alone in our efforts to heal ourselves from our addiction.
We are willing to be vulnerable because the capacity to trust has been restored to us by our faith in a Higher Power.
We surrender, one day at a time, our whole life strategy of, and our obsession with, the pursuit of romantic and sexual intrigue and emotional dependency.
We learn to avoid situations that may put us at risk physically, morally, psychologically or spiritually.
We learn to accept and love ourselves, to take responsibility for our own lives, and to take care of our own needs before involving ourselves with others.
We become willing to ask for help, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and learning to trust and accept others.
We allow ourselves to work through the pain of our low self-esteem and our fears of abandonment and responsibility. We learn to feel comfortable in solitude.
We begin to accept our imperfections and mistakes as part of being human, healing our shame and perfectionism while working on our character defects.
We begin to substitute honesty for self-destructive ways of expressing emotions and feelings.
We become honest in expressing who we are, developing true intimacy in our relationships with ourselves and others.
We learn to value sex as a by-product of sharing, commitment, trust and cooperation in a partnership.
We are restored to sanity, on a daily basis, by participating in the process of recovery.

The Promises

We will regain control of our lives.
We will begin to feel dignity and respect for ourselves.
The loneliness will subside and we will begin to enjoy being alone.
We will no longer be plagued by an unceasing sense of longing.
In the company of family and friends, we will be with them in body and mind.
We will pursue interests and activities that we desire for ourselves.
Love will be a committed, thoughtful decision rather than a feeling by which we are overwhelmed.
We will love and accept ourselves.
We will relate to others from a state of wholeness.
We will extend ourselves for the purpose of nurturing our own or another’s spiritual growth.
We will make peace with our past and make amends to those we have hurt.
We will be thankful for what has been given us, what has been taken away, and what has been left behind.

The Blessings

We came to find intimacy with ourselves, intimacy with God, and then intimacy with others.
In domestic partnerships we discovered a whole new experience of sexuality as a non-addictive medium.
In relationships with others we let go of self-serving power and prestige as driving motives.
Careers that had been exploited mainly for material security at the expense of self-fulfillment no longer appealed to us.
Our usefulness as channels for healing was a direct result of our experience in sickness, as well as in recovery.
We discovered that we could continue to affirm our recovery by working with other sex and love addicts.
We discovered that the source of love, which was of God, had begun to flow from within us.